The thing about ad school, is that it's the only academic institution in which headmasters, staff, faculty and students are all twenty something. Campus is a hip reformed warehouse, somewhere downtown...preferably in a chi chi artsy area. It's a place where you get to hang out on bean bags, play fuse ball and draw on whiteboard top tables, while peoples dogs frolic around freely(you know, like at Google).
Despite the entire place looking like a daycare for adults, no one there is having fun. The only communication is a wincing glare every now and then, cast through thick black-rimmed glasses peering out the corner of a sleek Macbook Pro(did I mention that the "extremely affordable" laptop was a requirement to enter that school?). I have never seen such jaded people in such a colourful ambience, it was like where clowns went to retire and end their days shooting up heroin.
Day one at Ad school.
I bit down on my bottom lip. I had inconveniently placed myself on the very far right of the room, meaning that I was first to present myself. Though we were officially introducing ourselves to everyone, we had all gotten the low-down on each other the day before at orientation. Hell, we all knew who was who, the teachers all knew who was who. They just wanted to make us all squirm in front of each other, to see who would sink and who would swim.
Perform!
Dance monkey, Dance! That was ad school for ye.
I was screwed. I hadn't worked at Coca Cola like the guy with the cool 'fro from Atl. I didn't just whimsically switch careers from interior design to advertising like the old timer over there, nor was I a big time painter like the brooklynite with the mirrored aviators on. I was just little 'ol me, with sweat now profusely pouring down the back of my neck.
I stood up quickly, still half stuck between my desk and chair.
"hiiii" my voice quivered. So....I'm a mutt....
Need I say more for you to know that I bombed my introduction....just like I bombed many more intros, presentations, pitches and idea boards at that school. I just couldn't perform.
And yet in college I Aced public speaking, I was the official announcer at all of our High school sports tournaments and I loved(but I mean LOVED!) presentations....I even brought props sometimes!(too much?)
But in the dog eat dog world, all I could find to sell myself was...I'm a mutt.
Why, you might ask?
Because in my little microcosm of happy internationals and hippies, there was no need to sell yourself. I mean call it kumbaya, but where I came from, who you were was pretty much enough(Awwwwww, isn't that sweeeeeet). In fact, to us, selling yourself often looked contrived and arrogant. Like people were twisting and overdoing ever bit of their existence.
Now, sometimes it was, however nowadays when it comes to doing the things I really want to do, you better believe I left Kumbaya behind and learned to sell that mutt to make her look like a Class A pedigree(which I am after all ;).
So back to my story. Neither Ad school nor the Ad world was the place for me, no regrets on dropping out by the end of the first quarter(none at all!). But it brought me to an important place. Writing.
Thank god we had to take creative writing in Advertising school.
Unlike in every other class where I was snickered at, mocked, constantly criticised, talked over and put down...from the moment I walked into writing class, from the first scene I read, I saw those same bastard's jaws drop!(sorry to brag, but come on, I had to show those bullies my talent) I knew that if I could impress them, then with a lot of hard work(and im still getting there) I could impress a lot of people.
The other thing I found out about in ad school was creative pressure. For those of you who complain about corporate pressure and to everyone else my age who talked to me about their masters programs: NONE of it sounded like advertising school, or creative pressure. Corporate pressure is based on facts. Usually, the fact of something selling... or not. Creative pressure is based on pulling a rabbit out of your hat, making it tap dance and roll its own cuban cigars which it then passes around to smoke with the audience.
And then coming up with a hundred more tricks just like that, just in case they didn't like the first one.
So let's get to selling yourself; the final important lesson that I learned from Ad school.
In advertising, products have what is called a USP, or a Unique Selling Proposition....and guess what...So do You!
A USP is what makes a product absolutely,unequivocally, differentiated from all the other products on the market. But guess what, since products are all just copies of one another....often USPs are not that Unique, the brand however, was just the first to make that claim about the product. Are you confused yet? let me give you an example:
M&Ms: they melt in your mouth and not in your hands.
BAM! there you have it....a USP that will make billions. Granted, candy coated chocolates have been around for ages, but no one ever thought of mentioning how terribly practical they were.
So Instead of saying: I'm a mutt...I could've started with I'm a third culture, trilingual globe trotter who has broken bread with saudi princes and rubbed shoulders with the sons and daughters of United Nations diplomats(true story).Too much? Now, there might be more like me out there....but I said it first!
So how did I Finaaallly learn all of this? The same way I learnt most of life's pearls of wisdom...Dating! And no, I'm not talking about getting bogged down in a hum drum relationship, I'm talking about meeting a slew of young, interesting, professionals while remaining single and keeping all possibilities open.
You see dating is my comfort zone. It's something I have mastered, and I notice that dates are pretty similar to job interviews. I'm serious! You kind of have to make the other person relax, adjust your scope to them and sell them a few of your best USPS. In short, you have to make the person sitting in front of you, like you. No matter who they are.
So here's the thing about selling yourself in General.
1. Find Genuine USPs about yourself that you are truly proud of.
2.Capitalize on your USPS....don't talk about TV shows while you're on a date with an Amish guy.....talk about that interesting knitting class you took, or candle making or...beards. Same thing in the professional world. Adjust your USP's to each situation and tap into each person's psyche. Keep doing what works and throw out what doesn't. For example, in the creative world, it's great to mention experience, but talent is your real USP. So even though I hadn't worked at coca cola, and my background(whether I present it as a mutt or globe trotter) wasn't that important...What I should have talked about was a photography contest I won, an article I got published or my high school band.
3. Make up for your weaknesses, by ever so slightly inflating your strengths. You're not quiet, you're a great listener, You're not lazy, you just work better under pressure and your not unsure about your future, you are open to whatever life may throw at you.
And finally, while you are supposed to sell yourself by slightly twisting things, don't flat out bullshit people. Professionals have a keen eye for knowing when you are selling yourself in a league you never made it into. If you really have absolutely no experience, and cannot get away with: "I really love doing this" the best you can do is pull the humble card.
The humble card goes like this:
Hi! I don't know shit about this, but I really want to learn about it...which is why I'm here. And by the way, I want to learn about it from you, because I'm a HUGE fan of your work(insert google research you did on your future professor/employer here)
So there you have it!
Thats all Folks!
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